Friday, 30 November 2018

November Round Up.




What I've been up to:

Firework displays and hot chocolate drinking

Autumn walks

Celebrating my 27th Birthday, which included lunch at the Giggling Squid with my Mum, and dinner and drinks with my friends.

Celebrating my friend Matts birthday, Jess' birthday and my brother Will's birthday - November is a busy month for me in the birthday department, I've found myself going for lots of meals and to the cinema this month. 

Re-evaluating, figuring out what I want, and how to get there.


Reading

Magazines/Online Articles

Vogue: What Company gets right about being single when everyone else is married by Sophie Heawood

Manrepeller: Vintage Shopping Could Make Your Whole Dang Outfit by Pandora Sykes

ID Magazine: Harry Styles in conversation with Timothée Chalamet

The Telegraph: Joe Sugg Strictly Diary honestly the part about his head looking like a conker was that got me reading this...

The Sunday Times: The Apps That Can Replace a Relationship by Dolly Alderton

Glamour Magazine: Soft Boy is the new F*ck Boy by Samantha McMeekin

Red December 2018 issue: A Very Schhmaltzy Christmas by Dolly Alderton

Red December 2018 issue: The Gift of the Grudge by Sophie Hannah

Red December 2018 issue: Scarlett Curtis on Christmas Traditions

Blogs

Tanya Burr: A Recent Shoot in Peckham this one is more imagery than words, but I kind of love it.

Steve Booker: Highs and Lows

What Olivia Did: Five Skincare Favourites

Brittany Bathgate: Autumn Exploration

The Anna Edit: How to Budget for the Christmas Season



Books

- When We Collided by Emery Lord:  I'm not going to say too much about this one, because I want to write a full blog post on it, I'm just going to say, I loved everything about these characters and their stories. Keep an eye out for the full review which will go live next Friday.

- Playing Big by Tara Mohr: It's taken me a while to get through it, I know. I find this book brilliant with an edge, of boring, however, I do think there's a lot I can learn from it.



Watching

Netflix
Riverdale
The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina
Gilmore Girls

Youtube
Zoella Vlogs
Jo and Dianne react to dances

Listening:

Podcasts
The Fringe of It
Nobody Panic on How To Be More Organised
Feminist Don't Wear Pink with Alison Sudol
CTRL ALT DELETE with Pandora Sykes

Music
LM5
Ariana Grande
One Direction (lol going old school)


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Monday, 26 November 2018

Fear and thoughts.




I find motivation a weird one. For me, it ebbs and flows. I can wake up some days I feel like I can take over the world, and other days I can barely pull myself out of bed. 


Recently, I’ve been particularly unmotivated and taken habit in abandoning crossing off my to-do list and traded it in for seeing how much Netflix I can watch. It’s only now, I realise why. I, almost completely, gave up on myself. 

My goals felt so far from reach, that I stopped trying, I avoided admitting this by writing a well-intentioned to do list, knowing I’d only cross off pointless things I added to the list to keep some of the guilt at bay. Everything of substance was soon forgotten, as I spent my afternoon in bed because the work I need to put to achieve the things I want does not have an immediate payoff. It can feel as though, it's all for nothing.

Why did I let all my motivation casually wander out of my life? Because I was scared. Because it seemed so unlikely that I'd ever become the person that I want to be, so it was easier to be as far from the person as possible. 

Failing is scary, and not failing, is even more so, because then what? Success can be underwhelming after working so hard, what if it doesn't live up to what I want it to be?

The book Playing Big by Tara Mohr talks about two types of fears:

Pachad is the over-reactive irrational fear that stems from worries of what could happen, worst-case scenarios we imagine. 
The other type of fear it talks about is Yirah which has three different meanings: 1) It is the feeling that overcomes us when we inhabit a larger space than we're used to. 2) The feeling we experience when we suddenly come into possession of considerably more energy than we had before. 3) It is what we feel in the presence of the divine. 

It was only on reading this I realised, I've stopped believing in myself because I'm afraid of taking up more space, of the new energy which success will bring to me. The fear I've been running from, winning a game of hid and seek against by snuggling beneath my duvet at 2pm on a Thursday after, is a good thing. I should be greeting it with open arms. 


I didn’t blog last week, because I didn’t want to. The realisation that I'm simply scared, wasn't the kick up the bum I needed. I still didn't feel like taking physical action to make thing happen. So, instead, I’ve been reevaluating. Figuring out what I actually want, and how to work towards that.

I realised, what I always knew: 
I want to write. For myself, for magazines, books, fiction, non-fiction. I have a love affair with words, that I'm not ready to end yet.
I want to blog. This website is my space, and I want to take advantage of that, I want more people to read it, I want to take up more space, which is, of course, scary.
and I want to Youtube, because I enjoy the process of editing videos, creating something visual, and having candid chats with a camera. I'm intrigued by filmmaking even at it's more basic levels. Again, here I want to take up more space, I want my time and effort to be of value to others, not just me. 

There are all things I've done for years, spent my free time working on things, for joy. That joy seemed to dissipate somewhere along the lines recently, I think because I became aware I wanted to take up more space in these areas, it felt I was asking too much by wanting to earn a living from my hobbies. They are things I do for joy, yet so many others who get paid to these this. My chill time is somebody else 9-5, so why the hell can't it be mine?

Rhetorical or not, I've got the answer to that question. I don't believe in myself when I should. If I don't no one else will. I got scared and stopped putting the work it. 

So here is me, waving goodbye, or saying hello to that fear, facing it head-on, and saying, I'm going keep at this and one day this will be my day job.

To freshen things up a little, I've created a new, blog specific Instagram - I felt like I wanted a more fashion based account, and something felt right about starting from 0, so you can find that @chloeharrietsblog. As I said pre-youtube break, I am going to vlogmas this year so it will be great if I feel like people are watching, you can find my channel here.

I'm going to promote my work more, and putting my all into blogging again. 

Sometimes I'm going to be afraid, but fear can be fuel.


Outfit Details:

Coat (similar) - Hat (similar) - Trousers - Shoes

photography: madeleiinegraceblogs
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Friday, 16 November 2018

6 Career Books.




I thought I'd start (another) new blog series, this one on the books, as I am a massive bookworm. where I want to discuss several books for different genres in each post, including the ones I've loved, what I'm currently reading and those on my to-read list.


So today I wanted to jump right in with career books. I've noticed especially over the last year or so, a lot of stigma surrounding self-help career books is beginning to dissipate, and rightly so. Now we proudly show off the career books they're reading on Instagram and the genre seems more popular than ever, which personally, I'm over the moon about because I'm always looking to read something which can help with self-improvement. I think it's important to always try to better yourself, and career books seem the perfect way to do so.


Currently Reading:

Playing Big by Tara Mohr
I heard endless good things about this book, so could help but pick it up. I'm a little shy of 100 pages in, I'm finding there are some points in the book I love, and there's a lot to learn from it. However, certain parts feel too dragged out, which make them slightly boring and repetitive. Having said that, what the book teaches I feel could be life-changing.  It explains how to stop fear holding you back, and how to 'play big' in whatever way is right for you.

Previously Read:

You are a Badass by Jen Sincero 
I've read this book twice, and I think it's probably the best ' self-help' style book I've ever read. It is full of advice and wisdom on how to live to your full potential. I know any description I give it, will not do it any justice, so I'm just going to advise you to give it a read.  'You are a badass' (along with Big Magic) got a mention in this blog post.


#Girlboss by Sophia Amoruso
#Girlboss serve as both a memoir and a career book at the same time, it is, of course, the story of how Sophia Amoruso built Nasty Gal essential from nothing. Alongside that it offers to the point advice for things like writing a CV, interviewing for jobs, and insight on how to become a successful #girlboss. It's both funny and informative and Sophia style of writing is very relatable, as is she. This book makes you feel like you can do anything. I was sceptical when I first began reading, as it was after Nasty Gal shut down, but despite that it's still great, I learnt a lot and considering Sophia has just continued building the GirlBoss empire after losing Nasty Gal I think it goes to show she is a #Girlboss and we could probably all learn plenty from her (and I was also gutted when they didn't continue the Netflix series after season one because I kind of loved it.)


Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert 
Big Magic is a book about living creatively. It personifies creativity, talking about how it finds you if you are open to it, and how creativity moves between people if you ignore it for too long. I'd never heard creativity described like this before, but on reading this something clicked, it's the only definition of creativity which I have found myself nodding along to. There's a lot of knowledge in this, but I think you need to be open-minded to use that knowledge to its full potential. If you're a creative person, this book is eyeopening and wonderful. Here's a blog post I previously wrote about the things Big Magic taught me.


Dipping in and out of:

The Little Black Book by Otegha Uwagba
This pocket-sized book is full of practical advice when it comes to careers and living successfully. From budgeting and knowing your worth. It's written in small sections which makes it easy to pick up and put back down.


To read:

The Multi-Hyphen Method by Emma Gannon 
I have had a copy of The Multi-Hyphen Method since it came out, and somehow still haven't got around to reading more than the first chapter, mainly because I want to make sure I give it my full attention when I read it, rather than reading it whilst I've got other books on the go. I love Emma's writing and I most certainly see myself as a multihyphenate so I am excited to dive into it.




Please let me know any of your career book recommendations, and your thoughts on any of these if you've given them a read!


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Monday, 12 November 2018

Gift Idea and Review 1: The Kevyn Aucion Prismagic Highlighting Trio.

  

With Christmas coming up, I wanted to do a few more post reviewing products which I think would make great gifts, from beauty to books and everything in between. These will all be things I own and have used and enjoyed myself so the series will create a 'sort of' detailed gift guides for the 20 something female.

First up we have the Kevyn Aucoin Prismagic Highlighting Trio. I got this for my birthday and was chuffed for it. It makes a great gift as it's luxury and a little unusual. It's not necessarily something you'd buy for yourself with the £36 price tag for three shades but if you really want to treat someone I think this highlighting trio is pretty special.

At first glance, the shade all look a sort of off-white colour with some glitter running through, however, once you apply them to the skin, the different colours show through, and, they all have an iridescent, glitter finish, which is just stunning.

The three shades are:

Aura: a beautiful lavender blue shade
Illusion: a sparkling peach shade
Enchanted: a green with a golden edge to it


I'll admit the blue and green shades are both a little out there for highlighters, despite however beautiful a glowy they are, I'm not particularly drawn to brushing these along my cheekbones, however, they make for stunning eyeshadows.

The formula is ever so slightly crumbly, however, with how I use the shades it doesn't seem too much of an issue. They still blend well and look gorgeous on the skin. Once applied on a brush, it is difficult to see how much product you've got on there, so it takes a little guesswork, but as shades apply quite subtly, only really standing out when you hit the light, too much product doesn't seem an issue. The shadows are buildable, so there is always the option of adding more.

The colours are both subtle and stand out at the same time. They apply quite finely, adding a hint of colour and a stunning glittery glow to the skin, but despite the vibrant shades, they are not too over-powering, they are simply a little more interesting than your average pink/gold toned highlighter.

The packaging is beautiful and luxurious. There is a little swatch of each colour next to the shades to give some idea of what they look like on the skin and there is also a mirror inside the compact. It's small enough to slip into a handbag although the gold reflective outside is just beginning for fingerprints, it looks beautiful and classy nonetheless.





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Friday, 9 November 2018

27 things I've learned in 27 years.


Earlier this week, I turned 27, so today today, I thought I'd share somethings I've learnt along the way.

1) Nothing clears the mind, quite like a walk in the woods with friends.

2) You are the most important person in your life. I am the most important person in my own life. However selfish it might seem, always put yourself first.

3) Friendships change, and sometimes you need to let go of them, not everything needs to last forever

4) Not everyone will always agree with you and that really doesn't matter. Not everyone will like you, and that really doesn't matter either.

5) Kindness is always more important than it seems.

6) What you wear, who you spend your time with and the media you consume will affect how you feel.

7) Just because something looks good on paper, it doesn't mean it will be that way in reality, that goes for people, jobs and the lives of others as they're portrayed on social media.

8) If someone ghosts you, let them. There's no need to try to start a new conversation after they didn't reply. There no need to dramatically ask them what you've done wrong (nothing), and don't bother to call them out on it, you're better off using your energy elsewhere

9) The feelings can't be helped, but how you react to those feeling can be.

10) Never respond when you're angry.

11) You will make mistakes, but at some point, you've got to forgive yourself. Reliving things in your head, will not change the past.

12) You can survive without the relationship you feel dependent on.

13) It's always worth making your bedroom a nice place to be. Light candles. Make your bed every morning. Put your washing away.

14) Always pee before you paint your nails

15) Give yourself a little longer than you think you need in the morning.

16) Mediation makes a huge difference

17) At some point exercise stops being like year 10 PE, you're better off to learn that sooner rather than later.

18) If you're uninspired, take a break. You're probably not reading enough, pick up a book.

19) Love doesn't matter as much as the romcoms make out.

20) Friendships require maintenance. You need to check in with your friends, be the one to organise meeting up. Send them flowers and let them know you appreciate them.

21) Spontaneous nights out are usually the best ones.

22) You've got to give yourself a permission slip - It's down to you, to let yourself do the things you want to, and be the person you want to be, nobody else. No one else will give you a green light to go for what you want, it's all on you.

23) No one knows you, like you, listen to your intuition over other people

24) No feeling lasts forever.

25) Feminist are not 'hairy angry women'. They are strong, important men and women who want to make the world better for everyone.

26) What others choose to do with their body is nothing to do with anyone else. Whether somebody wants to change their gender, not shaving or say goodbye to make up. It only becomes your business when it's your body and your mind.

27) You're allowed to like what you like and want what you want.

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Outfit Details: 


Leopard Coat (Similar)  - Jumper (similar) - Jeans (similar) - Shoes - Doctor Martens - Headscarf (similar)

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Wednesday, 7 November 2018

5 Memories from 26.



Above, is a photo which was taken on my 26th birthday, and now, very soon I am turning 27.



Being 26, was kind of a big deal for me. I have a thing for the number 26, with no logical other than, I really like it, so, on turning 26 years old, I had big plans for the year, it was going to be the best year of my life. Well, I'm not sure that's completely true to say, but I feel like it's carried some good memories, 5 of my favourite memories from this past year.



1) Birthday Celebrations 


26 began with a bang, I made an effort to really celebrate my birthday, going for a day out with my family and both meal and night out with my friends, indulging on all the special birthday feelings. Blog post on that here.




2)Vienna 


My friend Matt and I went for a weekend away in Vienna. Over those few days, I became very fond of the city. It's strange how a place can start to feel so familiar and comforting in such a short amount of time. By far, my favourites parts of it were the National Library and the incredible greenhouse which we just happened to stumble upon. Full blog post on the trip here.


4) A Summer of harbourside walks and aesthetically pleasing coffee shops with Kelsey 


Summer was full of happy memories for me. The weather was incredible and therefore myself and my friend Kelsey spent a lot of time wandering along the harbourside, drinking coffee and sharing secrets. I laughed so much, fancied pretty much every barista, and it was wonderful.




5) Portugal 


This year, I went on a beach holiday, something which I hadn't done for years. I forgot how calming it is sitting on the beach, with a good book, the happiness that comes with feeling the waves as you laugh with friends in the sea. Full blog post here.



5) A new start


 This memory is more recent, and I wanted to include it because it's pivotal to the rest of my life. This year, not so long ago, I left the job I'd work in for years because it wasn't on the career path I wanted to be on. So far it's been challenging, but that decision is something I know will change my life for the better.  More on that here.


Now bring on 27, I'm excited to see what you've got planned for me!


Love always,
C x



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Friday, 2 November 2018

Dear Diary,



My mum tried to, kindly, talk to me about the big 'what next'. She told me that I need to think about it. I haven't been able to stop crying since, because it's all I've been thinking about and still I don't have the answer.

Everything I want to do with my life takes the building, and it seems people in the career paths I want to be in, have been given different bricks to me. I'm not saying they didn't work for it, because I know they did. But what happens when the work doesn't seem to be paying off? When you're completely invisible, how do you make yourself seen? The work never seems to form anything tangible. Other people just don't seem to care about it, does that mean it's time to give up?

I don't want to spend the rest of my life, in a job I dislike, I want a career I'm proud of, one which I've built with my own two hands, but maybe I'm incapable of that.

Logically, I know they haven't, but I feel the people around me have waltzed into the right careers and I've barely taken a step forward since graduating if anything I've stepped backwards.

I turn 27 soon, and I don't have a job, which for someone who reads endless career books, is heartbreaking.

People keep telling me "loads of people have jobs they don't want" I know they do, but is it really such a bad thing that I want more than that for myself? Wanting to enjoy my life, is not too much to ask for, surely.

I guess there's nothing to do, but keep working, and hopefully, in the future, I'll have some more positive diary entries to share,

Love,
Chloe x


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