My 2021 Word of the Year - Control.
A few years ago, I noticed on Instagram, that when a new year came rolling around, some people choose a word for the year. I liked this idea, I mean, I like words and new year promises, so why wouldn't I? Yet several years passed and I did not choose my word - simply because I could not think of one worthy. I couldn't narrow down my hopes for an entire year into one word.
2020 came to an end, and more than ever I noticed the Instagram posts where people shared their chosen word for the coming year. Words like alignment, growth, trust, health were thrown around. They all sounded great, but none of them felt like the one for me. They didn't quite align with what I was in search of, what I wanted my focus to be over 2021. I began to think maybe it was time to admit defeat, another wordless year as no word felt fitting.
And then as warm water fell on me in the shower one day, a word came to me. I wasn't trying to think of the word at the time, yet there it was, as clear as day. Control.
Why control?
I've become one of those people who things just kind of happened to and don't happen for. It has been a long time since I felt like I've taken control, but in 2021, I'm determined to change that.
I'm not naturally someone who takes control. I'm quite happy to let my friend pick where we're going for dinner (you know, back when we could do that), and my boyfriend can decide what we watch in the evenings (until it's football, and then I spend my evening reading in a different room). Usually, I don't take control, because I don't mind the outcome. But it seems my behaviour has leaked through to areas where the outcome matters to me. Sure, I don't mind whether we eat Italian or Mexican food, but I do mind how I'm spending my life day in, day out. Choosing (or not choosing) where we go for dinner should not feel the same as choosing (or not choosing) how I want to make a living.
I think control is a great word for me because I see two different sides to that coin. Having control can be a good thing, and letting go of control can be a good thing. I feel for years I've held my control in all the wrong places. I'm ambitious when it comes to my career, yet I don't really have one, that's an area where I need to take more control. On the flip side, I've had panic attacks in shops before, because there were too many people and I didn't know my way around - the lack of control overwhelmed me. That's an area where I shouldn't desire that sense of control to the point that I go into panic without it.
I was listening to a podcast recently, and one of the hosts said something along the lines of "there are many things around you that you can't control but the one thing that you always have control over is yourself, you actions and your mindset" and that stuck with me. Accepting I can't control outer factors, but can always control myself gives me hope. It makes me want to take action, rather than accept defeat.
I'm a big believer in manifestation and the law of attraction. I was listening to an audiobook on it recently and it spoke about both taking inspired actions and surrendering your wishes to the universe. Having faith. I like this idea that there's both a push and pull of energy. Places where control needs to taken and places where that control needs to be surrendered.
You can control actions but not the outcomes.
During 2021 some ways I will take control include:
- Meditating on a regular basis - it's good for my mindset, and while I can't control my anxiety, I can control how I manage it.
- Doing the things I'm curious about - following my intuition.
- By not giving up on myself.
- Putting my time into making my book the best it can be to up my chances of finding a publisher
- I can control how I spend my time. Less scrolling, more reading, more moving, less lounging, etc
- What I'm putting into my body. I want to eat food which fuels me and leaves me feeling healthy.
- The media I consume.
- The actions I take.
- What I'm spending my money on.
Things I can't control, and how I can reframing negative thoughts:
- Job rejections - rejection is just redirection.
- Political and world news. I can control how much of that media I consume, and what I share myself.
- What other people think of me - and at this point, I don't think I care.
- What the universe has in store for me.
- Other people.
Outfit Details
Coat: M&S - Dress (worn under jumper): Mint Velvet (similar linked) - Jumper: ASOS (similar linked) - Bag: Coach (similar linked) - Headband: Chloe Harriets Creates (my Etsy store)
Every Book I Read in 2020
As I have done the last couple of years (see my 2018 reads here and 2019 reads here) I wanted to begin the year by sharing a little about every book that I read last year, along with my ratings and links to any more in-depth reviews and thoughts.
So without further ado, here's the lowdown on every book I read in 2020...
An Edited Life by Anna Newton
I loved this guide on home, work and life organisation. I found the tips to be useful and Anna's tone to be relatable. I talk about it more here.
★★★★☆
Good Morning, Good Life by Amy Schmittauer Landino
I listened to the audiobook of this guide on how to make the most of out of your mornings. I found it had some great tips and made me want to spring out of bed in the mornings - however a lot of the tips and content you could get from the author's Youtube Channel.
★★★☆☆
The Best of Me by Nicolas Sparks
Atomic Habits by James Clear
Nothing More by Anna Todd
The Course of Love Alain De Botton
Wild by Cheryl Strayed
My Life in Thirty-Seven Therapies by Kay Hutchinson (*gifted)
In this memoir, the author talks about how she turned to alternative therapies - from yoga to tarot card reading and so much more. I found this lighthearted read really enjoyable. You can read my full review here.
★★★☆☆
The Kissing Booth by Beth Reekles
The Kissing Booth Going the Distance by Beth Reekles
Five Feet Apart by Rachael Lippincott
We of the Forsaken World... by Kiran Bhat (*gifted)
We of the forsaken world tells several stories about the different facets of humanity and environmental impacts. The stories range from the tales of a remote tribe, a town destroyed by an industrial spill and more. It's not my usual style read, but I found this book to be interesting and thought-provoking. I talk about this more here.
★★★☆☆
Find Me by André Aciman
The Map From Here to There by Emery Lord
The Map From Here to There is the second instalment after The Start of Me and You. This young adult novel follows Paige, her boyfriend and their group of friends as they face many decisions about the future (colleges etc), juggling school, work and social life, alongside living with mental health struggles. It was an enjoyable read, however, I didn't feel I could relate to the characters as a woman in her late twenties. I talk about this more here.
★★★☆☆
Why I Am No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge
A Monster Calls by Patrick Ness
She Means Business by Carrie Green
Harry Potter & the Philosopher's Stones by JK Rowling
My Lovely Wife by Samantha Downing
Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli
Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secrets by JK Rowling
Harry Potter & The Prisoner of Azkaban by JK Rowling
Get Rich Lucky Bitch by Denise Duffield-Thomas
The Potion Diaries by Amy Alward
Lucky Bitch by Denise Duffield-Thomas
The Love Square by Laura Jane Williams
The Places I've Cried in Public by Holly Bourne
No Turning Back by Tracy Buchanan
Love, Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli
Good Vibes, Good Life by Vex King
The Midnight Library by Matt Haig
Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid
Outer Order, Inner Calm by Gretchen Ruben
Feminist Don't Wear Pink & Other Lies by Scarlett Curtis
Super Attractor by Gabrielle Bernstein
Daily Habits for January 2021 | Goals & Intentions for a New Year.
Yoga
If you read this blog post of mine, you'll know I began last year with a 30-day yoga challenge, and I sure as hell plan on doing the same thing this year. Yoga helps me feel mindful, grounded and connected to both my mind and body, and that's something I want to take forward with me into 2021. I'll be doing the Yoga with Adriene, Breath Challenge through January.
Reading
I always tell people I'm a slow reader because although I read often, as I often find it takes me ages to finish a book - I recently realised something - it's not that I'm slow, it's that I don't dedicate much time to it. Sure I'll pick up my book before bed, but I don't actually go to bed any earlier to allow time to read, so my eyes are closing after just a page or two. I've decided this year to up my Goodreads goal to 50 (it was 35 for 2020) - it's quite a jump but there are so many books which I'm longing to read, plus, I'd like to challenge myself. There's nothing like getting lost in a book after all. So in January, I'm going to dedicate at least an hour each day to reading.
Instagram posts
Growing my Instagram will be a focus of mine for 2021 because I believe I share valuable content over there and deserves to be seen. Sure there's room for improvement, so I'll be working on making my content the best it can be. I'm going to be posting daily on both my grid and stories. In January I'm really going to put myself out there, on the gram, to build a community of like-minded people (if you fancy checking out my insta, you can find it here)
Meditation
I discovered meditation many years ago and fell in love with it - I've dipped in and out of it since. In 2020 life just seemed to get in the way I stopped sparing those 10 minutes to meditate. During January 2021 I want to get into daily meditation - I know those mindful10 minutes each day will do wonders for my wellbeing. If you're curious to which meditation apps I use, I wrote a blog post on my favourite ones a couple of years ago which you can find here.
Going outside
Sometimes I almost forget there's a world outside my home, which is crazy because I know being in nature does great things for my mental health. Every day in January I want to be sure at the very minimum to step out my front door, go for the a wanders, appreciate nature and breath in the fresh air.
Journalling
Journalling is another one of those good for my mental health things that I don't do enough. Even if it's just a line of two, every day during January I plan on getting my thoughts out on paper.
To hold myself accountable I will post an update at the end of the month and I will use the habit app keep track.
Outfit Details
What habits do you want to keep up through the month?
Wish me luck!
*affiliate links are used in this blogpost.
My 2021 New Year Admin Checklist | Life Organisation
Whatever you fancy doing in this time, you do you. If you want to relish in doing nothing, go for it but this blog post might not be the one for you. I sit firmly in the camp of overly enthusiastic when it comes to a new year, but I understand some people are the total opposite and really couldn't care less about the change of dates.
Personally, I find after Boxing Day there's only so much more watching Netflix, doing puzzles and eating pringles I can do. I get itchy to prepare for the New Year (which again is not something you need to do if you want to carry on as you've been going). But I love any excuse for a new start. I like to begin a year feeling both organised and hopeful for what's to come. I like to use the end of a year as the push I need to catch up on the life admin I've been putting off, so I can go into the new year with what feels like a clean slate. Each year I write myself a list of admin to complete before the new year, or within the first week of January, this year I thought I'd share it.
My 2021 New Year admin checklist:
- Organise my space:
- Give my phone a spruce up:
Change my phone background and rearrange my apps. Delete the ones I don't need. Go through my photos and delete those accidental selfies and unnecessary screenshots.
- Write a to-read list:
Get excited about the book I plan on getting lost in the new year. I also set my Goodreads goal for the year.
- Plan my blog content:
I always get the blogging bug back when a new year comes along - while I feel inspired I like to do as much blogging and planning as I can.
- Go through my finances:
Check if there are any direct debits I can cancel. Plan my budgets for the coming months.
- Unsubscribe to unwanted emails:
Get the inbox back down to 0, and stop the junk coming back.
- Put any dates into my diary for next year:
I don't want to be forgetting friends birthdays or missing appointments.
- Go through my laptop:
Clear unwanted files, put photos onto a hard drive, organise files.
- Social media maintenance:
Check bios are up-to-date, unfollow and mute accounts I don't love, change any profile pictures that need changing.
- Check all tech is up-to-date:
Finally, do that laptop update which I've been clicking remind me tomorrow on for the last 8 months.
- Update my blog media pack and CV:
Add on those achievements from 2020.
- Clean out my makeup bag:
It's usually looking pretty grimy at this point, so it's time to throw out those old mascaras and clean up the loose powder and foundation spills.
How do you like to get organised for a new year?!
I hope you found this post useful!
Chloe x
FollowThe Places I've Cried in Public by Holly Bourne | Book Review
I recently finished reading The Places I've Cried in Public by Holly Bourne, I closed the final page and thought 'that was important, everyone needs to read this book'.
8 Fun & Cosy Autumn Activities | Things to do this Fall.
Looking for some fun activities to do this Autumn? I've got you covered.
Personally, I love this time of year, there's something about the crisp air, crunchy leaves, and warm colours speaks to my soul. I've also learned that it's good to lean into the thing I love and make the most of my favourite time of year. Even if you're a summer baby, mourning the warmer days - these activities will get feeling the autumn love.
- Pick Pumpkins:
- Decorate Pumpkins
Dedicate an evening (or afternoon, morning, or whenever takes your fancy really) to decorate your pumpkins. Have a pumpkin carving contest with the members of your household. Make an event of it. Not into the carving part? Some of the pumpkins we picked this year are on the smaller side, so we've decided to paint them instead. Who'd have thought one vegetable could provide so many fun autumn activities, and we haven't even discussed cooking with them.
- Making decor:
For me, each new season comes with a new colour palette and an excuse to mix things up in the home. This Autumn I decided to get a bit creative and make my own decor. I crocheted mini pumpkins and a black cat garland (I have both of which are also available to buy on my Etsy store If you don't fancy making but do fancy decorating). I found making my own bits felt really relaxing and it gave me something a bit different to do in the evenings. If you do want a creative project, I'd recommend Love Crafts (I worked with them in the past on this blog post, but I'm just sharing now because I think it's helpful!) They have tonnes of access to free knitting and crochet patterns on their website which you might want to try out. If crochet is not for you, why not give making an Autumn wreath a try?
- Autumn walks:
- Castle visits:
- Watch Gilmore Girls:
Crochet/Knit:
- Cosy up with a blanket, some candles and an Autumn film:
An obviously one I know, but sometimes you can't beat the simple things. Netflix has a great selection of cheesy, autumnal rom-coms, which seems to be my new favourite genre of film (I've recently watched Harvest Moon and Falling Inn Love, both so bad but so good, you know?). Enjoying them with a hot chocolate and a blanket is sometimes all you need for the perfect autumn evening.
Instagram | Etsy | Twitter | Pinterest | Facebook